Why ADHD Tools Can Feel Like 'To-Dos'
And How to Change that.
If you’ve ever tried a new ADHD tool, planner, or app and felt like it just added to your never-ending list of things to do, you’re not alone. Many adults with ADHD share the same frustration: tools designed to help us, can feel like another thing to grapple with and manage. Instead of making life easier, they become reminders of what we’re not doing. Let’s explore why this happens and how to turn tools into trusted allies, not burdens.
Why ADHD Tools Feel Like More Work
Tools Ignore the ADHD Experience
Most tools are designed for neurotypical brains—ones that thrive on structure, consistency, and routine. ADHD brains, on the other hand, often reject rigid systems, struggle with starting tasks, and get overwhelmed easily. A planner that requires daily entries or an app with endless notifications can quickly feel oppressive.The "Should" Problem
For adults with ADHD, tools often come with a side of guilt. “I should use this every day.” “I should already know how to organise my time.” This internal pressure creates a negative relationship with the tool, making us avoid it instead of embracing it.Over complication
ADHD brains love novelty and complexity… until we don’t. A tool with too many features or steps can be exciting at first but quickly becomes overwhelming. Before we know it, we’re back to square one, looking for the next shiny system.Lack of Personalisation
Every ADHD journey is unique. What works for someone else might not work for you. Many tools fail because they don’t adapt to individual needs, preferences, or rhythms, leaving us feeling misunderstood and unsupported.
How to Make ADHD Tools Work for You
The good news? The problem isn’t you—it’s the tool. Here are strategies to turn the tide and find solutions that fit your brain and lifestyle.
Start With What Feels Natural
Instead of trying to force yourself into a system, choose tools that align with your strengths. If you’re visual, a colour-coded calendar might be more effective than a text-heavy to-do list. Love gamification? Look for apps that turn tasks into rewards.Simplify the System
One of the best ways to combat overwhelm is to strip things down to the essentials. Use tools that do one thing really well, whether that’s managing time, tracking habits, or organising ideas. Simplicity is key.Focus on "Want To" Over "Have To"
Instead of framing tools as a necessity, think of them as a way to support your goals. For example: “I want to feel less stressed about deadlines, so I’ll try using this app” feels more empowering than “I have to use this app to get my life together.”Personalise Your Tools
Make your tools work for you. Set reminders at times that make sense for your schedule, customise labels to match your workflow, and don’t be afraid to ignore features that don’t serve you. The more personal the tool, the more likely it’ll stick. A complex productivity app sounds great but it’s probably not the thing you need if you’re feeling stuck, demotivated, overwhelmed or burnout.Celebrate Small Wins
ADHD brains thrive on dopamine, so celebrate every step forward. Used your planner for three days in a row? High five yourself. Managed to break a task into smaller pieces? That’s a win. Small rewards can reinforce positive habits and keep you motivated.
Simple, targeted, adaptable
I used to have a very in-depth, complex planner which was great but I literally ignored 80% of it and only used the basic lists. Now, I have a very simple planner where I can see an overview of my week with each day broken down into time blocks. It also has a ‘gash’ page per week where I can scribble ideas, notes and thoughts. I also use a timer on my phone.
When it comes to everything else, including specific challenges around motivation, organisation and getting things done, I need a prompt, a spark that activates my brain and shifts me into gear. I need an app, service or system that not only helps me fire up but is flexible, interactive and can adapt to fit my personal journey.
Tools That Work for ADHD (and Why)
Here are some ADHD-friendly tools we’ve seen work well if they suit your needs:
Time-blocking apps (like Google Calendar or TimeTree): Great for visualising your day and managing time blindness.
Task management apps (like Todoist or Trello): Flexible and customizable, so you can create workflows that suit your brain. The Pair Thinking team use Trello :-)
Pomodoro timers: Help you stay on track with timed work sessions and breaks.
Habit trackers (like Habitica or Streaks): Turn repetitive tasks into rewarding mini-games. It’s not one for me but that’s why finding what works for you is so important, we’re all different.
The key isn’t just choosing the right tool—it’s making it work for you and not the other way around.
Final Thoughts
It’s so easy to feel like we should be able to crack on if we use recommended, popular or neuro-typical friendly systems . Sometimes though, you might actually need a different kind of support that meets you where you’re at. It’s definitely time to stop blaming yourself when tools fail or don’t work for you and start demanding more from the systems designed to support you. Pair Thinking was built with this in mind: to adapt to you, your needs, and your unique ADHD journey. Remember, the right tool won’t feel like a chore. It will feel like a companion, cheering you on as you navigate life with confidence.
How can Pair Thinking Help?
Pair Thinking is your ADHD wingman, an A.I. powered coach, teacher, psychology expert and personal assistant. Available 24/7 whenever you need them, they’ll get to know YOU, where you’re at and what you want - recommending and facilitating specific learning modules alongside flexible and adaptable day to day support to help you navigate life. Whether you’re newly diagnosed and discombobulated, someone with goals you can’t seem to achieve, or you’re fed up with feeling overwhelmed, misunderstood and alone, Pair Thinking was created to help ADHDers like you shine their light and thrive.
